There are many signs around campus that spring hath indeed sprung. Students pretending to read on the quad, couples taking their wedding photos directly in your path to class at 9 in the morning, and weird amounts of middle schoolers roaming around in the Hub. But perhaps most notable and exciting are the increasingly warm-weather-oriented fashion choices that are spreading throughout the student body.
Read MoreRecently, the Associated Students of the University of Washington, or ASUW, which is best known for sending you emails, came out with a bold new live dating show featuring students from our very own university. Unfortunately, none of our writers were able to get in. Let it be known we all applied, but none of us were selected. I received an email back only containing my headshot and the subject line “lol,” but bygones are bygones.
Read MoreSpring has sprung in the University of Washington, which means that it’s going to start raining only six out of the seven days of the week, as opposed to eight. But with the oncoming of clearer skies and sunnier days, so does the onslaught of—you know them, you love them—tourists.
Read MoreA shocking revelation has been presented to Off Leash News from esteemed reporter Jacob Dindler: every woman on University of Washington’s campus has a boyfriend.
Read MoreA single-family home. A loving spouse. 2.5 kids. Doesn’t that sound nice? All of this could be in your future. But judging by the state of your life right now, it won’t be. The problem is that you have a terrible addiction: You can’t stop making daily purchases between $5-16. They come in all sorts of forms. A caramel macchiato with oat milk. A soy vanilla latte. A bagel with cream cheese. You need to buy something small, yummy, and slightly overpriced in order to feel some semblance of productivity for the rest of your day.
Read MoreThe University of Washington is known for many things: groundbreaking research, a beautiful campus, a football team that exists and is pretty good sometimes, a lovable husky mascot, and a second, slightly creepier husky mascot. Not among these features is its spring break scene.
Read MoreI’m probably not going to get canceled for this because I’m a STEM major, and STEM majors are always right… except during the release of the ugliest vehicle ever (which we can all unanimously agree is the Cybertruck.) Or the whole Neuralink idea. Or when one fumbled Grimes after naming their son after a G1 Transformers sound effect. Or how Twitter’s title was changed to something you’d probably expect on 18+ sites, or one of those discord servers. You know what I’m talking about.
Read MoreUs Seattleites sure do love our pits. So much so that we formally recognized Pittsburgh, PA as our official sister city on September 10th, 2001. To continue to foster our understanding of our dear sister city, I recently spent a weekend in Pittsburgh.
Read MoreLast week, an administration change required that all classes at the University of Washington record their lectures through Panopto and post them to Canvas to give students a chance to review classes they were absent for.
Read MoreIn the past week, nearly one hundred students have reported finding strange emails in their personal inboxes sent from addresses within the University of Washington domain. Senders include faculty members from the Paul G. Allen School of Computer Science and Engineering, the Michael G. Foster School of Business, the Phineas Flynn College of Engineering, and other STEM-related departments.
Read MoreLast week, a ground-breaking research team compared samples of George Washington (G) DNA and the entire University of Washington-Seattle Campus. Verdict says: He is the father!
Read MoreThey broke your heart, and you never want to love again. Or have sex. Isn’t it fair you do the same thing to them? Hall Health certainly thinks so. That’s why they’ve rolled out a Sex-No-More program that will ensure you can rest easy this Valentine’s Day.
Read MoreThe Kansas City Chiefs once again captured the Lombardi Trophy on Sunday night, beating the San Francisco 49ers in a stunning overtime victory. Celebrations were halted, however, when league officials released a statement a few hours later saying their win was to be investigated on account of the entire Chiefs team, including head coach Andy Reid, using performance enhancing drugs.
Read MoreOn January 7th, the UW community received a hilarious email detailing a new anti-hazing program for all three campuses. What many thought to be a joke turned out to be a serious attempt at eliminating hazing from the university. Students were told to complete a course, titled, “Hazing Prevention 101 – College Edition,” which up to this point only 0.12% of the student body has completed.
Read MoreBuckingham Palace put out a statement Monday, February 5th, detailing that current British monarch, King Charles, has been diagnosed with cancer. But it’s super unrelated to the big butt problem he had a few weeks ago where his prostate, which is located in the butt, got really big. Don’t worry.
Read MoreGreat news is here for all former 8 year old girls. With the completion of the IMA Pool, the UW Rec Clubs program will be offering a new water sport as of Spring 2024: mermaids.
Read MoreOn Monday, the Safeway located at the intersection of Brooklyn Ave and NE 50th Street announced that they would be enforcing a dress code for all customers, effective immediately. Officials at the store stated that the dress code will be strictly enforced and that any customer who did not adhere to the code would not be allowed to shop at the establishment.
Read MoreEarlier this week, Off Leash news got a chance to speak with Darron Barenett, a concerned student hoping to publicize a struggle he’s facing at the University of Washington. Darron is a music major set to graduate at the end of this year, but he expresses worries that the university has not fulfilled a key aspect of his education: a proper examination of ska music and its history.
Read MoreLook! There’s that cute person in your quiz section you noticed the first day of class. You’ve caught their eye a few times and maybe they smiled. One day they ask you how you are, your name, or how you felt about the homework. Before you know it you’re making regular small talk. Everything is going perfectly.
Read MoreA freak accident involving Dubs II left five people injured and two dead on Wednesday morning. The incident occurred during a photo collab between the UW’s mascot and Starbucks Coffee near Drumheller Fountain. Dubs had been licking a double shot of espresso out of an eco-friendly container when a group of students rushed forward to try and pet him, causing him to lash out. All three victims were rushed to the hospital, and two have since died from their injuries.
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